Need to be selfdisciplined:

Ever since I lost Anand,my life is out of track.The person who knows what is right and what is wrong for myself is only me.I did not drink for about 2 years after Anand's death.Since than I tried couple of time unsuccessfully to quit,but was always couldn't last longer.I my worst enemy when I am drunk.I never smoked but used chewing tobacco for many years.

I know that drinking in moderation is good or may be O.K.But when you don't know the limit it is worst.I want to overcome this.Every time I think to overcome my drinking habits,something emotional,physical,social comes in and that prompts that I can't stop it completely or make it moderately.

I am evaluating reasons why I need to drink?Following things comes in my mind,

1:You want to feel that you want to enjoy your success and want to prove that you can feel high and want to forget that no one can stop you of doing whatever you want to do.

2:You want to prove that you have higher capacity than other people and can tolerate more than other.It can satisfy your ego.

3:When you feel lonely and alone or when you feel that you are being ignored or being unappreciated for what you are or what you have done for other people.These moments are the worst moments.If you start first drink in this situations,then there is no end.You can not stop still you are completely drunk.

4:Socialism is another reason why you drink.When you have company either at your home or outside,you don't want to look like a chicken or cheap that you cannot afford to drink.

5:You want to celebrate all the moments and you think that life is only once so why not celebrate it.But when you over celebrate you forget your limit.

Today I want to make up my mind to make to moderate my drinking.I want to do following things.I want to pray to Almighty God to help me achieve my goal.I have to do this for me.As I am the only person who knows that what is better for me.I know that what I am missing and I am the only one who knows what I can do if I can control myself.

1:Wake up early in the morning like 7 am.Start your day early and work at least 9 hours a day.It will not only increase your control on your businesses but eventually increase your income and you don't be out of touch.

2:Regularly keep walking as I am doing almost everyday.But at the same time increase your work out like skipping rope or do head stand or run about at least half a mile.

3:Try to sleep early like at least by 12 at night,so at least you wake up fresh.

4:Stop attending public event as I go first come home last and always give company to everybody to the end.

5:Stop inviting friends over.As soon as I have more people around me I can not stop till last person leaves.

6:Keep laptop away from my bed as either I play solitaire or watch movies and sleep very late.

Let us see who wins if it is my will or my habit.I have to do this as I know that it is good for me.

Please God give me strength to overcome this.